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March 15 2010 - With the announcement that
JAH Willing the Dubroom will resume posting
daily updates at March 22nd, a 2 1/2 month
hiatus comes to an end. For those
interested, here's a personal report from
that hiatus.
I give thanks to JAH for the fact that
what was one of the coldest winters over
here in the Netherlands since a long time,
is either gone or about to go. Piles of snow
accompanied gray skies in what seemed to be
a perfect illustration of my inner state as
well. An inner state which I could in the
beginning of this year only describe as a
total fatigue.
Basically I needed to settle in a brand
new personal situation, for which JAH Works
were done in the years before that. Works,
which meant for me that I was unable to do
the things I used to do, both in the
Internet as well as the Outernet. Works,
which also put me to the test as to my faith
in JAH.
On several occasions, I was put in a
situation where there were only two
possibilities: either I was a total fool and
fooling myself about some imaginatory
"Jah" as the current Zeitgeist
tries to tell people, or I simply had to
trust in what I knew the Most High had told
me.
In all of this, it didn't matter what I
thought about these possibilities, though.
There was not much I could do about the
situations I saw myself in, all I could do
was to watch and pray while things developed
the way they did. Jah came true to what He
said, in ways that it was really clear how
it is HIM (and not me) Who is doing the
works.
Such times are perfect for the enemy to
step in with his most vicious arsenal,
trying to sow doubt and trying to suck the
life energy which Jah gives to His children.
Using truth-vibe, he tries to make Jah
children in their soul identify with the
sins in their flesh rather with their new
(spiritual) Identity within Yesus Kristos.
Sure you can be a witness of Jah works,
even used in these works, but none of these
things means that you are actually with Him.
I mean, He used Pharaoh to sent Jah Children
home after which He stroke down Pharaoh for
doing to Jah children what he did. To be
used by Him definitely does not mean that
you're actually of Him.
Sure we all sin and come short of the
glory of Jah. I have a lot of sins in my
flesh, with Paulus I say that I am the chief
sinner but with that same Paulus I also say
that these sins are not mine, but they are
in my flesh. Flesh and blood which will
perish.
Satan will therefore always try to point
out to the sins in our flesh and to the fact
that Jah is the (only) One-To-Be-Feared as
He indeed will use the Pharaoh's of today to
send Jah children of today to the Promised
Land.
During my 2 1/2 month hiatus, I truly
came to realize how much I was facing this
attempt by the enemy to sow the seeds of
doubt in my soul. Attempts to make me
identify with sins in my flesh, attempts to
make me identify with the works I was
involved in as if they were my works and not
JAH Works, in short: trying to con-fuse
truth and lies in order to mess I down.
I didn't realize this, until I was led to
rest a bit and reflect on the turmoil and
turbulence which accompanied me through the
years. It was not until I landed in these
Green Pastures, that Jah comforted me with
Truth and Right. But now that I'm there, I
can see a deeper level of spiritual reality:
that part of reality where the physical is
only a reflection of. A reflection we do not
comprehend without JAH Light to guide us.
I know now, that the enormous fatigue I
had was not caused by anything I had done.
It didn't either have anything to do with
what anyone else had done, for that matter.
It definitely wasn't caused by what Jah
had done!
The fatigue was predominantly caused by
the fact I was listening to the voice of the
enemy who told me to identify with Jah Works
as well as the sins in my flesh as if they
were my works. In other words: I was
listening to a voice that sowed doubt in my
soul concerning my identity. If I would have
been listening to that voice for a longer
time, I might even have started to look to
what is in reality JAH Works as if it is
works of the flesh or worse: works of satan.
I thank Jah for preventing the enemy for
taking me there.
However, just as JAH used Pharaoh to send
Jah Children to the Promised Land where he
only thought he would be killing them in the
Red Sea, He used the enemy to make me
realize to a deeper level just what it means
to not identify with neither the works of
the flesh, the sins in our flesh as if they
are ours, nor the works of JAH, which are
His' works and nobody else's.
Yes, He used the enemy to give myself a
deeper spiritual perspective on my identity.
I'm crossing the Red Sea.
One Love, Give Thanks,
Messian Dread
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